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  1. #261
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    I liked this quote so I stole it from MetalAbestos..

    He doesn't know it yet, but now he'll be famous cause he made my quote thread. Muahahaha!



    “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble.” --Charles H. Spurgeon.

    Full article at Scrap Metal Forum: http://www.scrapmetalforum.com/day-l...#ixzz34CItZzj0

    Originally posted by MetalAbestos at the thread above. Thanks for the contribution!

    Sirscrapalot - Beware of false knowledge; it is more dangerous than ignorance. - George Bernard Shaw

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  3. #262
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    I've got no dark secrets, I wasn't beaten up, my parents were kind to me and there was a low crime rate where we lived. Maybe that's where the comedy comes from, as some sort of reaction to the safe, boring suburbs. - Will Ferrell

    James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny - and I never was. - Will Ferrell

    Members of the Senate and House, if they want to send troops into war, should be forced to send a family member. That would really make everyone stop and go, 'Ohhh-kaaay.' - Will Ferrell

    Aren't we all striving to be overpaid for what we do? - Will Ferrell

    Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - Gracie Allen

    This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances. - Gracie Allen

    When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half. - Gracie Allen

    I love food: biscuits and gravy, cheese grits, spaghetti and meatballs, chicken-fried steak with white gravy... but my favorite dish is my wife's beanie weenie cornbread casserole. It's so good. It sounds stupid, but if you eat it, it's heaven. Of course, it's only something you can eat if you've got a lot of money. - Larry the Cable Guy

    What a piece of garbage this smart car is. There's a commercial - the smart car has zero percent interest for six years. Well, good, I got zero percent in six years in buying this smart car. I'll tell you that much. I mean, it's ridiculous. My buddy has a smart car, totaled it. He hit a deer tick. - Larry the Cable Guy

    Sirscrapalot - Our whole wedding cost 180 bucks. Afterward, we re-heated lasagna for everyone and set off fireworks. - Larry the Cable Guy

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  5. #263
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    Double Quote day!

    I've only been to these foreign countries: Canada, L.A. and Miami. - Larry the Cable Guy

    One of my little girls is named Reagan. Her first words were, 'Mr. Larry, tear down this crib.' That was her first words, it was very sweet. My first words were, 'Are you going to finish that sandwich?' - Larry the Cable Guy

    When Pixar calls and says, 'Hey, you wanna be in a Pixar movie?' you don't do a lot of contemplating! - Larry the Cable Guy aka Tow Mater, from Cars..did I really have to point this out?!

    I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. - Fred Allen

    The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion. - Fred Allen

    A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing, but who, as a group, can meet and decide that nothing can be done. - Fred Allen

    Television is a medium because anything well done is rare. - Fred Allen

    Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them and ask for autographs. - Fred Allen

    California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange. - Fred Allen

    As always..a good weekend to all!

    Sirscrapalot - I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement. - Fred Allen

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  7. #264
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    I found this one...KZ, NH...you should get a laugh. Rest of you folks..I hope you do to, an if not...I'm laughing for all of you.

    Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats; then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
    - Fred Allen

    Sirscrapalot - Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted. - Fred Allen

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  9. #265
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    Sir, whenever I am down and out I come to your thread to laugh.

    Thank you.

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  11. #266
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patriot76 View Post
    Sir, whenever I am down and out I come to your thread to laugh.

    Thank you.
    Your welcome my friend. Thank you for letting me know it does some good now an then.

    I think that's my favorite quote so far.

    Sirscrapalot - That crossover of whether it's entertainment or news is the biggest crock of b.s. in television today, because it's all entertainment. - Vince McMahon

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  13. #267
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    As promised the Father's day Quotes! Funny, sappy, we got it all.

    Read. Enjoy. Then go pop a beverage fire up the grill, have the kids fetch you more beverages and enjoy your day!

    Dad, wherever you are, you are gone but you will never be forgotten. - Conrad Hall ( for my wife, as her father passed away )

    Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad, and that's why I call you dad, because you are so special to me. You taught me the game and you taught me how to play it right. - Wade Boggs

    It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was. - Anne Sexton

    It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

    I decided in my life that I would do nothing that did not reflect positively on my father's life. - Sidney Poitier

    When it comes to Father's Day, I will remember my dad for both being there to nurture me and also for the times he gave me on my own to cultivate my own interests and to nurture my own spirit. - Jennifer Grant

    To be as good as our fathers we must be better, imitation is not discipleship. - Wendell Phillips

    I would say my greatest achievement in life right now - my greatest achievement period is - and I'm still trying to achieve it - is to be a wonderful father to my kids. - Bo Jackson

    I am not ashamed to say that no man I ever met was my father's equal, and I never loved any other man as much. - Hedy Lamarr

    A father is a man who expects his son to be as good a man as he meant to be. - Frank A. Clark

    It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father. - Pope John XXlll

    My father was my teacher. But most importantly he was a great dad. - Beau Bridges

    When I was 18, I thought my father was pretty dumb. After a while when I got to be 21, I was amazed to find out how much he'd learned in three years. - Frank Butler

    When I was a kid, I used to imagine animals running under my bed. I told my dad, and he solved the problem quickly. He cut the legs off the bed. - Lou Brock

    A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

    Pt 2..next up.

    Sirscrapalot - On a roll.

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  15. #268
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    It is much easier to become a father than to be one. - Kent Nerburn

    Watching your husband become a father is really sexy and wonderful. - Cindy Crawford

    I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out. - Jay London

    My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense. - Fred Allen

    Being a father to my family and a husband is to me much more important than what I did in the business. - Tom Bosley

    "Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up." - Ray Romano

    There should be a children’s song 'If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep. - Jim Gaffigan

    My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family. - Jeff Foxworthy

    Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. - Jack Handey

    The only Father's Day tradition in my family is the annual conversation he and I have where I say, 'Hey, Dad, what do you want for Father's Day this year?' and he says, 'Nothing.' Then I ask my mom what I should get him and she says, 'He likes sandalwood soap, dangly jewelry and Chanel No 5 perfume. - Michael Showalter

    Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. - Red Buttons

    I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

    My dad used to say 'Always fight fire with fire,' which is probably why he got thrown out of the the fire brigade. - Harry Hill

    On the perfect Father's Day. There would be just Dad, wearing his oldest surviving undershorts, free of pressure, maybe just sitting in front of the TV, watching the NBA finals. There would be no conversation, other than Dad periodically observing that these players today could carry the ball across Montana and never get called for traveling. … Of course, that's not all. You'd also make a restaurant reservation, and at the end of the day, you'd dress up and go out and have a nice dinner, during which you'd propose a toast to Dad. Who would be back home, in front of the TV, happily asleep in his veteran underwear. - Dave Barry

    Pt 3!

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  17. #269
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    Last..one..I swear. So many to choose from...

    On with the show!

    My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ! - Bill Cosby

    My father only hit me once - but he used a Volvo. - Bob Monkhouse

    Any man can be a Father but it takes someone special to be a dad. - Anne Geddes

    My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." - Harmon Killebrew

    My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic - Spike Mulligan

    The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. - Tim Russert

    Every mother generally hopes that her daughter will snag a better husband than she managed to do...but she's certain that her boy will never get as great a wife as his father did. - Unknown

    My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. - Clarence B. Kelland

    A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society. - Billy Graham

    Sirscrapalot - Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance.- Ruth E. Renkel

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  19. #270
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    I coulda made a new thread, but why bother...

    I give to you...Dancing animals to the 80's song..Push it!

    May it make you laugh an look silly if anyone is around you at the time.



    Sirscrapalot - Push it..push it...- Salt n' Peppa

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  21. #271
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    An now we know why dogs an cats can't make peace...





    Sirscrapalot - Get over here! - Scorpion, or the cat in this video

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  23. #272
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    I'm going to share a few of my fathers famous quotes in appreciation of making the sirscrapalot world famous quote thread.
    The first three quotes are from when my dad when he took me to baseball games when I was younger .
    " look if I want a mounds bar do you think I have to call your mother for permission ?"- mom getting on him about finding a mounds wrapper stuffed inside the sofa.
    " I know you want to pitch , everyone does . You have the arm for it but I need you to play third because your not afraid to stop the ball "
    "Stop swinging at the high stuff , make them earn there pitch"
    "If I set up a tire in the back yard and charged you money to throw footballs at it , you would think I was crazy"- some circus we were at somewhere
    "Always quit the day before you get hurt, you only get one body and that's going with you from job to job"
    " work smart not hard , you have moved that three times , where you goin with that ?- moving cement when we did a neighbors driveway a decade ago.
    " don't ever say you can't , you can do anything if you stop and think about it"- can't remember the exact reference . Had to do with bidding something. Side job of some sort.
    "I wouldn't start that truck to do a job for less than $500and that's not including help ,gas , wear,tear,insurance,food,tools ya see these things add up and extra materials and hidden expenses are going to eat you alive. You need to be thinking of this stuff before you even drive to look at a job , you get hurt and your s.o.l. My boy"
    "I swear . I hope I eat something besides spaggetti and chicken some time in the next 20 years" - heard this every time we had chicken or spaggetti for dinner for over 3 decades. Still hear it about once a year.

    That post hit close to home because I'm going to be a dad in about a month and this Father's Day I got to talk with my father for a few hours on Father's Day . It was nice to spend time with him . All,I can say is..

    " I hope I can be as great a father , as my father was to me . He has taught me more than words can say and he is by far my best friend . The best thing I think he has taught me was just shut up and listen "

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  25. #273
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    Nice quotes there Metal!

    I like the circus one..lol.

    I thank you for the contribution!

    Edit: Hit post to quick..also my congrats on the future bundle of joy ya got coming!

    Sirscrapalot - Metal's pug is awesome sauce

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  27. #274
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    Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel.
    Napoleon Hill

    There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self.
    Benjamin Franklin
    There ain't nothing wrong with an honest days work. Anyone who says otherwise is a fool.- Old Man

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  29. #275
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    We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.
    Alfred E. Newman

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  31. #276
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    Quote Originally Posted by hobo finds View Post
    We are living in a world today where lemonade is made from artificial flavors and furniture polish is made from real lemons.
    Alfred E. Newman
    Now that is just too frick'n funny.
    Recyclable Material Merchant Wholesaler
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    "Give them enough so they can do something with it, but not too much that they won't do nothing."

  32. #277
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    To the European, a Yankee is an American.
    To an American, a Yankee is a New Englander.
    To a New Englander, a Yankee is a Vermonter.
    To a Vermonter, a Yankee is someone who eats apple pie for breakfast.
    And to a Vermonter who eats apple pie for breakfast
    a Yankee is someone who eats it with a knife.
    ~An old Yankee joke

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  34. #278
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    Today's quotes come from Martin Luther King Jr.

    Enjoy.

    The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people.

    Law and order exist for the purpose of establishing justice and when they fail in this purpose they become the dangerously structured dams that block the flow of social progress.

    Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.

    We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.

    Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

    The time is always right to do what is right.

    Never forget that everything Hitler did in Germany was legal.

    Sirscrapalot - Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.

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  36. #279
    Sirscrapalot started this thread.
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    There is no end to education. It is not that you read a book, pass an examination, and finish with education. The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning. - Jiddu Krishnamurti

    In youth we learn; in age we understand.- Marie Von Ebner - Eschenbach

    I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship. - Louis May Alcott

    He who learns but does not think, is lost! He who thinks but does not learn is in great danger. - Confucius

    Sirscrapalot - A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer. - Bruce Lee

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  38. #280
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